Hi guys, For saying I literally do nothing all day I’m not very good with keeping this blog up to date! Nearly a week later than when I said I’d post but anywhere here I am!
So in my last blog post I was saying how in my next physio session they’d be getting me up walking! Well I did it! I did my very first steps, not with my own prosthetic leg but with the dummy one.
It’s a little bit harder to walk with this dummy one than it will be with my own prosthetic leg because it stops my knee from bending so it’s a bit of a weird walk really! To begin with it felt strange, like walking on a dead foot, you know something’s holding you up but you just can’t actually feel that floor for yourself, in some strange way though it was nice. For the first time in my life I stepped my right leg down and didn’t get a pain from my foot/ankle!
I’ve done 2 walking sessions now and the second one was, to me, absolutely amazing. I didn’t feel the need to hold on as tight to the bars besides me and my confidence in walking reached a new level! However to say this whole thing is going to be easy would be a lie. For as long as I’ve been able to walk and I’ve never walked “normally” and had my own little way of doing so. Having support from sticking my foot off to the side or taking more support through one leg,my hips and my back it’s going to be a difficult habit to break from.
It’s like your entire life you’ve walked in a way that to you was normal and then suddenly you’ve got to stop it, it’s not normal and you’re being trained to walk an entirely new way that everyone else finds simple, it’s natural. To me not so natural.
Something I don’t like is change, so everything being different is taking some time to get used too.
Recently I’ve felt more vulnerable to comments than what I ever have done and stares from people. I’ve never had a problem with being different because it wasn’t really noticeable before, unless you saw me walking. However now, you can visibly see I’m different. I know having one leg doesn’t make me a different person, but it definitely makes me stand out and right now I do not wish to be standing out. I’m not ashamed of being an amputee or regret it one bit, but it does make people treat you differently. I suppose because people have treated me as if I’m vulnerable it’s began to make me feel it? I am trying though, to keep my old self going and embracing this change. Maybe it’s a change that everybody goes through at different points in there life and I’m just noticing mine more?
On a positive note, I’ve been noticing that my blogs are reaching more people, even in different countries! Places I’ve never visited or know anyone from and the people that I do know tell me how they enjoy my blogs and how informative they are. I never expected such a positive reaction from this. I expected to post one and then take it down and keep it private for myself incase nobody was interested, but it turns out quite a few of you are so that’s something that makes me happy.
Whether this blog helps other people like me going through the same situation or just informs people things they didn’t know so they could help others it’s all for good reason! And on that topic, I recently came across a page called Limbless Association. This page has people who have different missing limbs and volunteers who help amputees like myself. At the moment they’re wanting to widen their exposure I suppose you could call it? Right now the page are needing signatures so that more people can find it. From the last time I checked it only needed a little over 40 more. All it takes is to click on the link that I will post on the end and signing in to either your Facebook or twitter and clicking the red support button. It won’t spam you with anything or hack your social media it’s just letting them know you’ve recognised them and you never know, one day you or someone you know may need them! I know that I get well over 200 views in just the first day of uploading so if only half of you signed that would help out massively. It’s 2 minutes of your time to help others without much effort really and it really will help!
If you’ve got this far then you’ve reached the end of today’s blog! Thank you for keeping with me!